Vertigo

This is what I've got. It's like a dizzy, spinning feeling that doesn't go away. Not dissimilar to being on a boat, rocking in the waves.

Therfore I hae just been resting the last few days. I have another symptom of sore calves like i've been cycling or doing yoga for hours, which I haven't been able to do. It's difficult to do yoga when one feels this way.

My bags were collected this morning so today is my last day in Tokyo and I feel like this. Ah well, such is life!

My daily teachings from 'The Secret' for today is lovley

"When you find your purpose, it is like your heart has been set alight with passion, you know it absolutely, without any doubt"

I am still waiting for my purpose but think it has something to do with sharing yoga.

Last night bad boy called me. We spoke to each other for 45 mins. I am unsure of what to do of the situation. It's like a poisonous fruit. I know long term he's bad idea for me but I do actually think i love him. He makes something glow in my heart...my intuiton will guide me.

"Deep and true change comes fromt the inside out, not the other way round"

This is a quote from Baron Baptistes book, 'Journey into Power.'
I read much of this book on my round trip to Narita airport this morning. I read it several years ago, loved it then and am finding it just as, if not more inspiring this time round. As my friends told me the other night, I've grown up a lot, this is good. I feel mentally stronger but still growing. We are always growing.

Last night I didn't get much sleep which I put down to my little catnap earlier in the day. I still rose at 5.45 a.m., with a strong headache, to go to get the bus to take me on the 2 hour journey to the airport. It was like a game, trying to find my bag. I got a complicated map at the teminal that directed me to the cargo area. This was a good 15 min walk away. The building inside was like 'The Grudge'. The corridor went on and on and on. I was then told I needed to get customs to stamp a form, then go somewhere else to actually get the bag. A mission and a half? But I finally have my bag now, with all my clothes for the harsh winter.

So my headache has accompanied me all day, with, worryingly, stronger dizzier spell. Actually, i keep feeling disorientated. What will be will be, I suppose. I've had a pretty lazy afternoon. Was going to go to a restorative yoga class but a freind who I cancelled o last night has asked me to join her and others for dinner. I agreed, although my appetite isn't huge at the moment. Maybe I should stay in and rest. Baptiste talks much about being intuitive. That we always know deep down the right thing to do. I will attempt to go and see how I feel.